pavlov 2.0

So, most people are familiar with Ivan Petrovich Pavlov who famously conducted an experiment using dogs. The term "Pavlov's Dogs" is commonly used to refer to situations which display the accuracy of his findings. If you have no clue who Pavlov is, I would recommend you google his dog experiment, but in short here's the basic explanation (hopefully I remember it correctly, a few details may be off, but it's basically what happened): Pavlov would ring a bell just prior to feeding the dogs for a period of time. In time, once he would ring the bell, the dogs would begin salivating. They associated the ringing of the bell with eating time. Even if he rang the bell during a non-normal feeding time, they would become hungry and begin to salivate. Homer Simpson also stated this theory when he noted that cats come running into the kitchen when they hear the can opener. He then went running outside when he heard the ice cream truck. So, why am I bringing up an age-old experiment, you may ask. Well, I believe that his premise is generally accurate and there is an annoying occurrence in traffic which proves it. Police cars, especially when the lights are flashing. In the same way that the ringing bell would cause the dogs to salivate, the sight of a police car makes people hit their brakes. And quite frankly it's annoying. It causes so much traffic. A person can be driving 55 mph in a 65 and they will still hit their brakes at the sight of a cop. It can be a cop driving down the highway, one sitting and doing radar, or one with someone pulled over or assisting a broken down vehicle/accident. Lights on or off, people's first reaction is to him the brake. WHY?!?!?! We need to break ourselves out of this cycle. Let's prove Pavlov's theory wrong for a change and keep our feet away from the brake pedal the next time we see a cop. Thank you.

across the finish line

Thanks again to everyone for the support for my marathon run, both through donations and encouragement. Things didn't go exactly as planned and I learned a lot about perseverance, but as I said, I finished the run. And I can assure you, the pain was less and sense of accomplishment was greater once I was finally across the finish line. I'll write more about my full marathon experience later. In fact, now that my training's done, hopefully I'll be back to blogging a little more regularly. Below are a couple pics from the marathon.

it's not a sprint...

After months of running and training, the marathon is just around the corner...only 3 weeks away. There have been a lot of awesome things as result of the training. Obviously I've trimmed down and my overall health has improved significantly. I've had some lessons in patience and discipline. It's been fun at times. And there have been a number of frustrations as result of the training. My free time has been eaten up and well, I have to run a lot. Weighing those things out, I've come to the conclusion that I cannot wait for the marathon and will be excited when it's over...haha.

Thanks again to everyone who has supported Speed the Light through my run. I love you guys!

Also, when the marathon's over, I'll probably have time to update my blog again!!!

thanks, i think

I was talking to a friend who's wedding reception I recently attended. We were discussing how relieving it is to finally be done with all the planning and effort. He then mentioned how he and his wife were only almost done as they still had the thank you cards to knock out. And that got me to thinking... I sort of hate the whole concept of thank you cards. I mean, I'm all for being appreciative and grateful, but I think it's a waste of time and money to have to write out cards. Saying thanks at the party should be enough. That being said, people put a lot of weight into the thank you cards. Let's look at this from a gift giver's perspective: When I get a thank you card in the mail, I open it, say to myself "of course I got you a gift, I didn't need a card" and discard it. (When I originally wrote these words, there was no intentional pun, but I believe one may exist with "card" and "discard"...you decide.) At first thought, this made me think, "See the thank yous are unneccessary." But then I was thinking about when I haven't received one. I feel like the person is so unappreciative and ungrateful. I judge them instantly. Why is it that when we receive them we act like no biggie but when we don't, it's the end of the world. As further evidence of this, I had people ask if I got/enjoyed their wedding gift and then when I confirmed that I did, they brought up the fact that they never got a card. Now, I assure you that we sent a card to everyone and it probably got lost or something, but seriously, why do people make a big deal out of a little card? That being said, you can expect a thank you card from me next time you "deserve" one because I will stand in line and meet the status quo like everyone else.

superflously redundant

I hate when people use redundancies in general, but for some reason, it really stands out to be when people are redundant with acronyms. I heard someone using one of these today, which is why I thought of how much I don't like hearing it. Here are a few I can think of. Let me know if I missed any obvious ones: ATM machine (Automated Teller Machine machine) ABS system (Anti-lock Brake System system) ACT test (American College Test test) SAT test (Scholastic Assessment Test test) HIV virus (Human Immunodeficiency Virus virus) PC computer (Personal Computer computer) VIN number (Vehicle Identification Number number) Not the end of the world, but it sounds a little ignorant when people use them. Such is life.

what can go wrong, will go wrong...

...and at the worst possible time. This sums up Murphy's Law quite well. And I was victim to that Law on May 18th. I have been busy, but needed to tell this story, so though it's a little late, here goes... On May 18th, I had the privilege and honor of officiating a wedding for my friends John and Tanya (big congrats to them once again). It was my first wedding, so as I generally do when I do something for the first time, I made myself a checklist to make sure I got everything taken care of. And everything started out going extremely well...a little too well maybe (I should have known). Some time back, I met with John and Tanya at their home and went over some different options for their vows and what I would say during the ceremony. They made their decisions, I wrote something up, they approved...check I submitted a day off request at work for the 18th and it was approved...check I went to John's mother's house on the 17th for the rehearsal and everything went smoothly...check At the rehearsal dinner, Tanya and John gave me the marriage certificate for me to sign and submit. I noticed a few errors on it, called Marlborough City Clerk's office the morning of the 18th, had them make the corrections, drove and picked up the err0r-free (I hope) copy...check I dropped off my suit at Men's Wearhouse to be pressed and received confirmation that it would be ready for me to pick up at 2:00 when I'd be driving through on my way to the wedding...check I had lunch with a friend at Red Robin's...check I picked up my suit from Men's Wearhouse and began the 30-35 minute drive to the wedding...check Making good time (I was 5 minutes from the wedding...the time nearing 2:45 for a 3:15 meet and greet and 4:00 wedding)...check Grabbed my phone to wish my friend Daphne Allender and my cousin Brooke a happy birthday (they share one to the year) and saw a missed call. I did not recognize the number and noticed there was also a voicemail. I casually held down the number "1" on my phone to retrieve the voicemail, enjoying my nearly completely checked off checklist. When I heard the message, my heart skipped a beat and my throat dropped: "Mr. Brown, this is ------- from Men's Wearhouse. I am calling to inform you that your suit pants fell off the hanger and we still have them here at the store for you. You may come pick them up whenever you can." WHAT?!?!?! My suit was still in the plastic Men's Wearhouse bag. I pulled over to the side of the road and ripped open the bag. Sure enough...no pants. Are you kidding??? Afraid not... I hadn't pushed my new car to the limit yet and didn't want to then. But, to some degree, I didn't have much choice. I gunned it at about 85 mph the whole way back to the store. I called ahead and asked them to reserve a dressing room for me so I could change and arrive at the wedding prepared. I got to the wedding JUST in time and as it turned out the bride was still getting ready...PHEW! I couldn't believe it though. Most stressful, frustrating hour of my life...not exagerating. Thankfully, the wedding went smoothly and if you ever see the photos, you'll see me with suit pants on. Darn you Murphy! And darn your law!!!

the day i fell in love

The day is May 7, 1983. Just one day earlier, Steve and Jill Brown welcomed their fifth child, little Michael Alan Brown into the world. But today, at 1 day old, Michael is going to fall in love with one of his greatest passions, crying tears of agony and of joy along the way. On this day, little Mikey Brown is listening to his first Red Sox game. Back in the early 80's, people were less rude, so hospitals were commonly fitted with head phones for people looking to watch TV Now-a-days, people blare their TV as loud as they want with no regard for hospital roommates (but this is a different topic for a different day). My parents were in the hospital room with their newest little treasure and my dad was doing what any good Red Sox fan would do...he was watching the game. As it turned out, pitching for the Red Sox on this day was Mike Brown. My dad thought it was so cool that a guy with the same name as his little boy was pitching. So my dad did what any good Red Sox dad would have done: He put the headphones on my little ears and let me listen to some of the game. Aside from causing long-term hearing problems (joking) the sounds went through my ears and straight to my heart. And naturally, as would only be fitting, Mike Brown pitched a complete game shutout against the Seattle Mariners on this day. I like to think I had something to do with that. You can view the boxscore of the game for verification by clicking here. So, at 1 day old, my passion for the game of baseball and the Boston Red Sox was birthed. And it has only grown ever since.

wait...when's his birthday?

Nothing beats that special day of the year where you celebrate the greatest escape of your life! The day when you finally won your freedom from the womb! For me, today is that day...or is it? So, my mother sent me something on Facebook yesterday for my birthday (that's right, my mom's hip to Facebook). I called her up and asked her why she jumped the gun and sent me something a day early. She informed me that she thought that the app wouldn't send the gift to me until today (I said she was hip to it...not that she's mastered it, ok). What happened next surprised me. My mom said, "When you were younger I did think it was May 5th though!" WHAT?!?!?! How could my own mother get my birthday wrong? She still doesn't know how she mixed it up, but she and my dad thought it was the 5th for a while. Then some friends of theirs visited (thank God, it was actually before my 1st birthday or they would have celebrated on the wrong day) who had a girl on the same day I was born. My mom said to the guy, "It's funny that we both had kids on May 5th," to which the guy responded, "My daughter was born on May 6th." WHOOPS!!! I would like to thank that guy for saving me from a wrongful celebration. This would explain why when I was like 13 and we decided to quiz my dad on our birthdays, he got the other four kids right while he thought mine was May 5th. I've seen my birth certificate, so I know that it is the 6th, but apparently my parents didn't bother to look. So instead of being a cinco de mayo baby, I'm a seis de mayo baby. Birthdays were cooler and more meaningful when you were a kid, but Happy Birthday to me just the same, this SIXTH day of May. Tune in tomorrow to read about what I did for the first time at 1 day old. I promise it's a classic and you won't want to miss it...no joke!

my elementary school owes me money

So, I was catching up with some elementary school friends last week and it brought back so many memories. It's funny how you will not remember something at all and then someone brings it up and you suddenly remember every detail. It's also funny how sometimes being around those people can make you think of random things. Elementary school for us spanned from kindergarten to 6th grade. I actually remember my 6th grade graduation like it was some big deal. I also remember in 6th grade when we had our D.A.R.E. banquet, and my friend Bailey had to deliver the speech with Chicken Pox. Good times. As cool as 6th grade was, with the feeling of being the top dog and owning the school, 5th grade actually offered something which was a bigger deal to me at the time: Lunch duty and office duty...let me explain. At Forestdale, 5th grade students were picked at random each week to be on lunch duty or office duty. The five who made lunch duty got to leave class early and help set up for lunch. We got to go into the kitchen (oooooooooh) and help serve lunch (aaaaaaaaaaah). Looking back, I don't know why I thought is was so cool, but I did. Office duty was less fun, but I still thought it was kind of cool. Two students would get picked to cover the school secretary's lunch break, which was like 45 minutes or an hour or something. We'd answer phones, do the paging, etc. What has since occurred to me in regards to lunch duty and office duty is that we were victims of forced child labor and for some reason, the law did not protect us. Seriously, the secretary was probably making like $15/hour while we sat there...and we got NOTHING for it!!! And I wonder how much money Forestdale saved by not hiring paid employees for lunch duty. Looking back, I'm surprised they didn't have up knitting afghans or making sneakers. I do feel like it was legalized forced child labor. I feel used. So, I've decided that I cannot sit back and accept this; I want money from Forestdale and the city of Malden for the work I put in. I figure that at minimum wage (I'll assume $5.25 at the time) for 20 hours of my childhood, Forestdale and the city of Malden owes me $105.00. With a modest 3% annual interest rate over the last 15 years, I estimate that to be around $163.57 that I am owed. I will take that in cash please.

sneaky little commercial, part 2

This has nothing to do with yesterday's post, but yesterday's post got me to thinking of another pet peeve of mine...when they sneak commercial into T.V. shows!!! I have become hooked on "The Biggest Loser" this season and thoroughly enjoy watching it. Maybe I'm just sappy, but I love rooting for people to succeed. Sadly, I can honestly say I've even shed a tear or two (like when Mikey gave up his year supply of food to Aubrey...touching). In fact, the only part of the show I don't like is when they have the shameless product placement. It happens all the time, but some of them stick out in my mind:

• Ziploc - Jillian came in to talk to her team and says something like "I need to talk to you about your food for a second" and then goes on to talk about how they should store the food in Ziplocs to maintain freshness. She did a nice demonstration.
• Steamed Veggies - Bob came in and saw some members of his team eating and UH OH, they didn't have any color on their plates. "That's ok," he said, "I've got something to show you." Then he goes to the freezer, pulls out this bag and talks about how healthy yet delicious the veggies are. The team members eat it with a satisfactory "MMMMmmm." One even threw in, "My kids will love these."
• Fiber One Bars - Once again, Bob was the culprit. He came in and asked if they've been eating enough fiber in their diets and they all play dumb and say, "What, fiber, I didn't know we need fiber." Even though for the past 10 weeks, all they've heard about is fiber. Nobody's buying it. But Bob conveniently had some Fiber One Bars on hand, spoke of their goodness, and then ended with, "And the best thing is that they're delicious."

I know that they need the money, but it's so cheesy and shameless. I just think they could do better with making it look more natural.

Every time I see it, it makes me think of "The Truman Show" when the wife is peddling the hot cocoa!

sneaky little commercial

So, I was watching television a little while back (nothing new there) when a commercial came on and grabbed my attention. Those of you who customarily read my blogs know that I have an affinity for infomercials since I find them so funny, but also how I hate the overt deception which they use. Well, this commercial I saw was not an infomercial, but it had some cleverly written deceptive wording to it. I don't know if you've seen it or not, but let me know if you catch the deception before I make it clear. I don't think you'll miss it. It was a cereal commercial (I don't remember the brand, so if the commercial rings a bell to you, please let me know which it was so I can track down the video of it.) It did the typical showing of kids eating this yummy, delicious cereal and then threw out an interesting fact. It was something along the lines of "studies have shown that kids who eat [name of cereal] do [insert percentage, maybe like 20 or something]% better in school than kids who don't eat breakfast." I know I didn't have the verbatim script, but did you catch that sneakiness. If you didn't then read it again. This says nothing about the quality of their cereal versus other breakfast foods. This simply shows us the advantage of eating breakfast in general. Notice they didn't say that the study showed how kids who eat their cereal do whatever % better in school than kids who eat other cereals. They generalize it by saying they do better than kids who don't eat cereal at all. Pardon my antiquated use of the following word but DUH!!! I've been taught my whole life that breakfast is important and beneficial to kids who eat it versus kids who don't. I don't want to know if your cereal is better than no breakfast at all...I want to know if it's better than other breakfast options. Most people just listen to the nicely spun statistics and say, "Ooooh, gotta get me some of that!" without reading between the lines. Maybe I'm just picky but the commercial really annoyed me. Commercials are known for doing this.

3 out of 10 ain't bad

In baseball, 3 hits in 10 at bats is not only considered efficient, but it's also considered very good. The all-time MLB average is thought to be somewhere between .260 and .275. Getting a hit 4 out of 10 times is almost unheard of. In fact, the last baseball player to get a hit 4 out of ten at bats was Teddy Ballgame (Ted Williams) who batted .406 in the 1941 season. That means that nobody has done it in the past 57 seasons. That's simply incredible. I don't have statistics to back up my thoughts on meteorology, but I'm sure that most would agree success and efficiency in that industry is about as low as a bar can be set. The weather men and women are lucky to get it right twice a week from what I've seen. There are certainly other fields which don't require much better luck to be considered successful, but meteorology is at the bottom of my list. This got me to thinking...which professions/industries would suffer the most to have such a low standard of expectation in order to be considered successful? Sticking to the baseball "3 out of 10" model since the efficiency rate of meteorology would be difficult to quantify, I would like to hear some ideas from you. I will begin with a few candidates of my own (in no particular order):

• Surgeon - Think about it...if you needed an operation for something and found out that your surgeon performed the surgery at 30% chance of success, you wouldn't be too confident about the surgery at all. I know that some surgeries may have a poor rate, but what if this was the general rate? Do you think Hollywood stars would be so adamant about their plastic surgery if this were the rate of success?
• Lawyer - Would you hire a lawyer if you knew he/she was only successful in 3 out of 10 lawsuits?
• PCP - What if your personal care physician successfully diagnosed his/her patients at a 30% clip? Sign me up...I don't think so.
• Fast Food - What if a fast food joint only got your order right 3 out of 10 times? Ok, ok...bad example. I'd be ecstatic if they got my order correct that often. This is why I hate fast food.
• Prisons - What if a prison boasted at its ability to retain 3 in 10 prisoners? Would you move to that area?
• AIG Big Wig - What if AIG big wigs mismanaged their company into the ground? Would they deserve bonuses? What? That happened? Oh, my bad.
• Prophylactics - "Buy our brand of prophylactics, they are successful 3 in 10 times!" Don't think so.
• Judge - What if a judge only reached the correct verdict 30% of the time?

There are so many more and I have so many on my mind but didn't want to write them all and take up all the good ones. I wanted to leave a chance for you to give some input. Let me know what you think.

sometimes being nice is mean

Yesterday, I posted a blog about my weight loss and how bad I looked in the photo from my wedding shower. Check yesterday's blog if you haven't already so you can know exactly what I'm talking about. Some people, including me, came up with what I thought was a good, legitimate question based on my Jaba the Hut inspired picture...Why would Polly let me be seen in public like that? Seriously, how could someone who loves me let me look that awful? Well, I did the best thing I knew to do in this situation...something foreign to many people who want an answer...I asked Polly. Me: "Polly, looking at this picture, it begs the question: How could you let me leave my house like that?" Polly: "I didn't want to be mean and hurt your feelings or make you mad at me." This was a commendable response and showed her pure, loving motives for why she didn't comment on my gooiness in that shirt. However, I think this may have been an occasion where being nice was the mean thing to do. As I told her, I would rather have had my feelings hurt a little than having subjected myself to public humiliation and fodder for laughter. It's much like when parents think it's cute when their kids dress themselves, but they look so bad that they're bound to get picked on. A little positive criticism and advice is a good thing. (For the record, there's a girl in my church who is excellent at dressing herself and it actually is cute...I'm not looking to discourage that practice, but simply desiring to put parameters around it.) When we decide to do something nice, we should make it a point to ask ourselves if we'd actually be nicer to simply tell the truth, though it might hurt a little initially. For example, Polly and I were going out Sunday and she put on an outfit and asked my opinion on it. The outfit itself was cute, but the back of her top was quite wrinkly. I could have been "nice" and said she looked great, but the true niceness in me compelled me to inform her that the top was wrinkled. Sometimes the line between being nice and being mean becomes blurry which creates the paradox which I have set before you: "Sometimes being nice is being mean!"

i promise i won't only post about weight loss...

...but you'll have to deal with at least one more. I have some pictures which were taken a couple of years ago while at a wedding shower that our church put on for Polly and me. They are easily the worst pictures I've ever had taken of me. Yesterday, as I was going through my closet to get dressed for church, I found the shirt I had worn for those pictures. I decided to wear it and then take a picture to show the weight I've lost since that time. I've lost 24 lbs. this year, but probably closer to 30 lbs. since this picture. Warning: Do not let children or people with weak stomachs view the following picture. It can cause nausea and in extreme cases vomiting may be present. So, there you have it. I'm so glad to be losing weight. I will definitely post more blogs soon not related to my weight or running. I feel the blogging fever coming back on.

it's not a sprint, it's a marathon...literally

Sorry I haven't written in a while. I've been busy. I'll try to come up with some more random humor on a more regular basis...I promise. Anyway, onto the point of this post... I am currently training for the Cape Cod Marathon, which I will be running on October 25th. I realize that I have no chance against any Kenyans or really anyone who is in any way athletic. Instead, I am running this marathon for the following two reasons: 1. I set a goal when I ran track in high school that I would run a marathon by the age of 30. What I thought at the time was that I would probably run one when I got out of college. What I didn't know is that I was going to put on 60 lbs. in college and become completely out of shape. Now that I'm getting back into shape, it's the perfect time for me to accomplish it. I've only got 4 more years until 30 and there's a good chance that I'll be busy with a kid atleast a couple of those years. That's cuts my options way down. So this is the year. 2. I want to raise money for Speed the Light which purchases vehicles and sound equipment for missionaries around the world. I had a friend run a marathon last year to raise money for Speed the Light and decided that if he could do it, I could too. If you would like to make a pledge in support of my marathon, please contact me at bostonbrown@gmail.com. I added the "donate" tab connecting to Paypal per request of a friend. Seriously, I have no clue why I let myself get so out of shape in the first place. I've lost 21 lbs already this year and will be looking to lose another 25-30 by the marathon. Wish me well on that people.

fitness update

Well, it's been a while since I have updated you all on how I've been doing on my weight loss/health regiment. Obviously it has been going well or I would not be updating it. Haha. At the beginning of the year I weighed 211 lbs. As of this morning I am down to 196 lbs. This marks 15 lbs. worth of weight loss (for those that can't handle the math). I have dipped from obese to overweight on the bmi scale also...haha. Also, it's worth noting that I've lost 1 3/4 inches on my waist. I'm feeling great and on my way toward my goal of 165. Here's the inspiration I've hung in my food cabinet:

you're eating what?

As many of you know, I'm a little overweight and have been losing weight lately. For any who care, it's been going well. One of the things I've been better at is paying attention to what I eat. In the past, I would go to a restaurant and eat whatever looked good on the menu, knowing nothing about the nutritional value. Now, thanks to the internet, I go online and research all the food at a particular restaurant before I eat there. It has helped me tremendously. I actually couldn't believe how unhealthy you can eat when eating out. It's scary to think that I used to do that. I thought it would be fun to go through some common restaurnats and pick out a tasty looking meal and then show the nutritional values that go with them. Hopefully someone reading this will be encouraged to look up the nutrition before they go out to eat next time. Chili's Appetizer Texas Cheese Fries: Homestyle fries topped with melted cheese, jalapenos, applewood smoked bacon & jalapeno-ranch dressing. Entree Crispy Honey-Chipotle Chicken Crispers: Extra crispy, tossed with our spicy and smoky honey-chipotle sauce. Served with ranch dressing. Dessert Chocolate Chip Paradise Pie: Warm, chewy bar layered with chocolate chips, walnuts, and coconut. Topped with vanilla ice cream and drizzled with hot fudge and caramel. Beverage 20 oz. Coke Uno Chicago Grill Appetizer Onion Strings: A heaping portion of crispy fried onion strings served with jalapeno horseradish dipping sauce. Entree Individual Chicago Classic Deep Dish Pizza: A favorite since 1943. Crumbled ausage, chunky tomato sauce, mozzarella and grated Romano. Dessert Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup: A huge peanut butter cup warmed and topped with vanilla ice cream and drizzled with chocolate and peanut butter sauces. Beverage 20 oz. Pepsi I tried to look up T.G.I. Friday's and Applebee's also, but their nutrional information was not readily available. Boo them. When looking at the nutritional facts, keep in mind that the average person's caloric needs are 2000-2500 daily. That may vary based on weight, age, sex, activity level, etc. but that's a pretty standard average. A person on a 2000 calorie diet should eat about 250 grams of carbs per day. According to Dietary Guidelines for Americans, 2005, we should be eating less than 2300mg of sodium per day. Those are the three things that I think are most worth nothing in the figures below. Of gram the fat content for most of these meals are way too high also, but these three numbers should give us a great idea of how unhealthy the above meals are. Keep in mind that the figures I have given within this paragraph are daily values, and these figures below represent only 1 meal out of the day. This is not factoring in breakfast, lunch, and daily snacking. It's sickening. Chili's Appetizer 1930 calories, 148g fat, 64g sat. fat, 67g carbs, 84g protein, 7g fiber, 3660mg sodium Entree 1990 calories, 110g fat, 17g sat. fat, 190g carbs, 61g protein, 8g fiber, 4790mg sodium Dessert 1590 calories, 76g fat, 37g sat. fat, 220g carbs, 19g protein, 5g fiber, 910mg sodium Beverage 240 calories, 0g fat, 0g sat. fat, 65g carbs, 0g protein, 0g fiber, 75mg sodium Total 5750 calories, 334g fat, 118g sat. fat, 542g carbs, 164g protein, 20g fiber, 9435mg sodium Uno Chicago Grill Appetizer 1800 calories, 126g fat, 21g sat. fat, 150g carbs, 18g protein, 15g fiber, 1890mg sodium Entree 2310 calories, 165g fat, 54g sat. fat, 120g carbs, 99g protein, 6g fiber, 4920mg sodium Dessert 1600 calories, 104g fat, 42g sat. fat, 142g carbs, 26g protein, 12g fiber, 840mg sodium Beverage 250 calories, 0g fat, 0g sat. fat, 70g carbs, 0g protein, 0g fiber, 50mg sodium Total 5960 calories, 395g fat, 117g sat. fat, 482g carbs, 143g protein, 33g fiber, 7700mg sodium See how these nutritional facts compare with a couple of the popular fast food joints. Burger King's nutritional guide and Taco Bell's nutritional guide was not working when I tried it. McDonald's Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese 740 calories, 42g fat, 19g sat. fat, 40g carbs, 48g protein, 3g fiber, 1380mg sodium Large Fries 500 calories, 25g fat, 3.5g sat. fat, 63g carbs, 6g protein, 6g fiber, 350mg sodium McFlurry with M&M's 620 calories, 20g fat, 12g sat. fat, 96g carbs, 14g protein, 1g fiber, 190mg sodium Large 32 oz. Coke 310 calories, 0g fat, 0g sat. fat, 86g carbs, 0g protein, 0g fiber, 20mg sodium Total 2170 calories, 87g fat, 34.5g sat. fat, 285g carbs, 55g protein, 10g fiber, 1940mg sodium Wendy's Triple w/Everything and Cheese 960 calories, 60g fat, 27g sat. fat, 39g carbs, 69g protein, 2g fiber, 2010mg sodium Large French Fries 550 calories, 26g fat, 4g sat. fat, 72g carbs, 7g protein, 7g fiber, 480mg sodium Chocolate Fudge Frosty Shake, Large 540 calories, 13g fat, 8g sat. fat, 95g carbs, 12g protein, 0g fiber, 370mg sodium Total 2050 calories, 99g fat, 39g sat. fat, 206g carbs, 88g protein, 9g fiber, 2860mg sodium Below are links to each restaurant's nutrional guide: Chili's (Click link on this page to download nutritional info) Uno Chicago Grill McDonald's Wendy's

american chop suey

Last night, we were discusses the foods we used to eat as kids, and one mentioned was American Chop Suey. Polly had mentioned in the past that she had never heard of it. Maybe it's a New England thing or something. American Chop Suey is essentially poor man's food. It's a combination of macaroni, a meat sauce (made with the fattiest hamburger meat you can buy, you know the one with the pig snouts mixed in; where you have to spit out some of the meat once you realize you cannot chew it...yummy) and various veggies. We used to eat this all the time. I think I liked it back then but probably wouldn't touch it now. What are some of the other poor man foods?

when sitcoms were good

I remember a time when sitcoms were still good. It seems like ages ago. "Reality" television has ruined T.V. Sitcoms aren't as funny as they used to be (as a general rule) and definitely don't have the value and principles behind them like they once did. I mean, I used to love Family Ties. That show was so funny. But it also had life lessons included. The same was true of Silver Spoons, Family Matters, Full House, and other shows like that. Plus, the laughter of the audience that could heard over the T.V. seemed so much more pure. It made you feel as though you were there. T.V. shows these days just don't give you those feelings anymore. There are no more good, quality family shows that families can sit down and watch together. Parents watch "The Biggest Loser" while kids are busy watching "The Hills" or "iCarly" (depending on the ages). Also, I used to love the old television intro theme songs. We would sing along to them. When I hear them still, they bring back such found memories. Those minute-long intros just simply don't exist anymore. Please tell me that I'm not the only one that remembers and misses those times. Oh yeah, and thanks to TV on DVD and hulu.com (via imdb.com) I enjoy many of my old favorites again!!!

now it's definitely a no!

I used to get so irritated with this statement as a kid. My dad used to always use it. It's cruel and completely dishonest in nature. It will be easier for me to explain this through an example. Me: Dad can I go to the movies with my friends. Dad: No, I don't want you going out. Me: All my friends are going to be there. Dad: I'm not everyone else's dad, the answer is no. Me: Please dad, I'll be home by 11 and all my homework is done. Dad: I don't care. I said 'no' and that's final! Me: This is so stupid! Dad: Fine, you want to have attitude, now the answer is definately no! I mean seriously, the answer was 'no' all along. Then parents try to turn it around to make it look like it could have been 'yes' if you hadn't ruined things. There was no chance that the answer would have changed to 'yes.' It's a mean, evil trick that parents play.

nine words women use

I don't know where this originated but it was given to me by a buddy. I am not claiming this to be my own original material, but I thought it was worth a re-post. 1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. 4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! 5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.) 6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome.' That will bring on a 'whatever'). 8. Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying [expletive deleted]! 9. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3. Haha. These are so funny because they're so true. Especially #2. It's amazing how time changes based on the circumstances. I hope you enjoyed!

insuring that i'm broke

So I spoke with my insurance company to get the specifics on my new health insurance (it changed as of 1/1/09) and was not exactly happy with the results. In order for my benefits to kick in (100% coverage with no copays) I must first hit my deductable ($2300). So basically, the only way the insurance will benefit me is if Polly or I go to the hospital this year. I mean, I'd hate to face a $20,000 hospital bill if I didn't have insurance, but still... My insurance is not too bad when you break it down because I pay only $14/week for both my wife and me. This adds just under $45/week if you break down the deductable bringing it to a potential total of just under $60/week. Most people pay a lot more for a plus one plan. Still, if you have to use the deductable right away and all at once, it would be tougher to come up with the money. On the other hand (no pun intended) I'm still paying for my broken hand from two years ago because my insurance at that time only covered a flat 80% of hospital fees. I regret that greatly. Anyway, it got me to thinking, I understand insurance for various things, but I hate them all. Health insurance, car insurance, life insurance, etc. I mean, with life insurance the only way to make out is if you die. You're betting you die while the insurance company is betting you'll live. Tell me that's not backwards. You pay car insurance in case you get in an accident, but if you actually get into one, your premium goes up to cover the amount the insurance company had to pay anyway, so really you lose there too. As is the case with most things in life, a few ruin things for the majority. The people who scam the system cause premiums to go up and we all pay for it. Actually, this post reminded me, I need to look into life insurance. Anyone know of any good plans for a healthy 25 year old. At least I have that going for me...

one week in

So, I'm one week into my health kick and still going strong. My numbers are all improving, so let's take a look (because I know how much you all care): Weight: 207.8 lbs (-0.8) Waist: 41 1/4 inches Stomach: 44 1/2 inches Disgusting Obesity Value: High (hey, that one will take time) Here's to hoping that I stick with it. I hope you're all rooting for me. Is 40 lbs. too much? We'll find out soon.

worst investment

Everyone knows what the worst investment is...a car. It is so irritating. I mean, as soon as you drive a brand new car off the lot, it's value diminishes quickly. So, my crappy Ford (pick your acronym - Fix or repair daily; Found on roadside dead) Taurus has been giving me problems lately. I brought it to my mechanic and it was a pretty cheap fix. Still, it has been nothing but problems lately and I discovered that their may be an internal problem with the car's transmission. Talk about expensive!!! There's no way I'm putting a new transmission into my car. Anyway, since I can have my car paid off in a couple of months, I have been hoping that it will last that long so I don't have to roll my old loan in with my new one. Realizing that this may not be a realistic option, my wife and I went car shopping the other day just to get a feel for our options. We actually found a couple of used cars we liked within our price range. I think we're leaning toward a 2003 Subaru Legacy with 70,000 miles on it. There's also a 2002 Honda Accord with the same mileage. I test-drove the Legacy and loved it. Regardless what I buy, I can promise one thing...it will not be American! I refuse to buy Ford, Chevy, or Dodge. Here's to hoping that my car holds out a little longer, so I can save myself from having to make worse what is already going to be a bad investment, no matter how you look at it. Yet, it's one I have no choice but to make.

ms. ward

Alright, so onto the Ms. Ward story I've been promising... My family moved from one side of Malden to another while I was in first grade. I finished my first grade year at Lincoln Elementary School and started fresh at Forestdale Elementary School for second grade. My first grade teacher, Ms. Bushway was mean. She tried to tell me that I couldn't eat the cupcakes my mother sent to school with me for my birthday because I didn't do my homework. She expected me to pass them out to the rest of the class and not have one myself. Let's just say that wasn't going to happen...and it didn't. When Ms. Bushway discovered that I would be transferring to Forestdale for second grade, she told me that she hoped I would get Ms. Ward, the teacher she had when she was in second grade. First, I couldn't believe how old this Ms. Ward must be if Ms. Bushway had her in second grade. Second, I couldn't believe a first grade teacher was telling a 7 year old kid that she hoped he got a mean teacher. No wonder I couldn't stand her. So, the teacher assignment arrived during the summer and who would I get for second grade...Ms. Ward of course. (I think the fix was in personally.) Ms. Ward didn't disappoint. She was the meanest teacher I had at any level of schooling, including high school and college. Not only was she mean, but she must have been the least helpful second grade teacher in the history of the world. Think about it...I was like 8 years old and still learning. At the age, it's normal to have questions for your teacher. In fact, questions should be encouraged as that's the way you will learn. Well, whenever you would call out Ms. Ward's name, she'd complete your sentence by saying, "...is busy!" and then would just continue what she was doing, paying you no attention. I'm not kidding and anyone else who had her can attest to this truth. Student wanting to learn: "Ms. Ward?" Ms. Ward: "...is busy." What the heck? That was always so annoying to me. I hated second grade! Third grade on the other hand, I had Mr. McCarthy. Best teacher. What a difference a year makes.

opening line

The new year's diet begins. The goal is to be less fat. Here are the opening stats: Weight: 208.6 lbs Waist: 41 1/2 inches Stomach: 45 inches Disgusting Obesity Value: High We'll see how commited I stay and how well this goes. In other news, my BMI says I'm obese but whenever I'm in a group of people which has fat guys and I make a fat guy comment, they all look at me like I'm crazy. Remind me that I still have to tell you about Ms. Ward sometime soon.

new year's resolutions

I resolve not to make any silly resolutions that I never intend to keep! It's January 1st again, and to most people, that means a clean slate. People can start off fresh on whatever changes and adjustments they want to bring to their lives. It's funny because Polly and I are going to start exercising again (she never really stopped, but she lumped herself with me out of love I think) and picked January 1st as the day. So last non-healthy day I will be at a party enjoying numerous munchies. I think I should do myself a favor and start eating healthier tonight. Why do people always need a new year (or month or whatever) to enact a positive change? It's okay to change your lifestyle and life now. I hope I'm listening to my advice. So I am about to break my first resolution already by naming a few resolutions. (I know I'm guaranteed to fail at something so I'm just trying to control my own failure a little.) Here they are: 1. I resolve to not eat peas in 2009 2. I resolve to not split infinitives in 2009 3. I resolve to not wear white after labor day in 2009 4. I resolve to exercise in 2009 (It's not definite yet, but I'm looking tentatively at July 29th as the day) 5. I resolve to maintain excellence in my blog 6. I resolve to stop lying to myself about the quality of my blog 7. I resolve to make my own lunch for work at least once a quarter 8. I resolve to watch more sports in 2009 9. I resolve to do better at finishing tasks without procrastinating 10. I resolve to... I'll finish this later. On a more serious note, I really would like to accomplish the following: 1. Read my Bible daily 2. Lose 30 pounds 3. Be a better husband, son, brother, youth pastor, friend, and employee Everyone be safe this new year! Blessings to all! The only question that now remains is, "When will I stop writing 2008 on documents?" Hopefully by May at least.

happy new year

Wow. It's already 2009. Time keeps flying on me.